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Choose Happy!
Every day is a brand new day. Sometimes the sun shines and sometimes it doesn't. Sometimes you wake up feeling good and sometimes you don't. But whichever way it goes you're still going to live the day. How you live it though is entirely up to you.
You can be miserable and grumpy or bright and cheerful. You can see everything that's wrong or all the wonderful possibilities. You can be down in the dumps or on top of the world. And you know what? You get to choose all that for each and every one of your days. No, really ... you actually get to choose!
And guess what? Your THOUGHTS always determine whether you're happy or not ... and the only person who can choose your thoughts is YOU.
Think back. Have you ever had an experience where someone did something definitely 'not nice' to you ... maybe even 'downright nasty'? How did you feel?
Probably pretty bad I imagine. Bad as in, hurt, embarrassed, angry, humiliated, disappointed, resentful or depressed.
Have you ever thought of it since? If so, how did you feel? If you're like most of us, each time you think about that experience you get those same 'bad' feelings all over again.
Can you see how your 'thinking about it' brings those bad feelings back and causes you to be unhappy?
Think back again, but this time reflect on a past experience where someone did something truly special for you ... really, really made your day! How did you feel?
No doubt you felt pretty good ... as in important, valued, loved or respected.
Have you ever thought of that since? And when you did, how did you feel? Again, if you're like most of us, each time you think about that experience you bring back those 'good' feelings again and are happy ... even if it's only for just a few brief moments.
So? ... So, the point is that whether or not you are happy has everything to do with how you THINK ... so why not think thoughts that lead to good, happy feelings? Why not CHOOSE to be happy every day?
But how, you may ask, can I do that?
Great question ... and the answer is quite simple. All you need do is practice daily the following 5 Step process.
- Make a CONSCIOUS DECISION.
- COMMIT to it.
- Look for the GOOD.
- Remember your INTENTION.
- AVOID the negative.
In a moment we'll look more closely at each of these steps and how you can apply them but first it's important to recognize that your thoughts are actually the ONLY thing in life that you have absolute control over. There's no question that people or circumstances may 'influence' your thinking, but nothing and no one can 'make' you think anything without your permission. And as you already realize, your thinking is what brings about your feelings.
Now let's look at 5 Steps to Choosing Happy.
Step 1 – Before drifting off to sleep at night make a CONSCIOUS DECISION to have a great outlook and enjoy the next day. Decide not to allow yourself to entertain any negative, unpleasant thoughts.
Understand that occasionally there may seem to be legitimate reasons for not feeling happy, yet even at those times there will also ALWAYS be reasons you can be, things in your life to be grateful for. So make a conscious decision to focus on those throughout the next day.
Step 2 – Immediately upon waking in the morning reaffirm your conscious decision to 'choose happy'. Determine that for the whole day you will do everything in your power to maintain an upbeat outlook and be happy. Before getting out of bed make a personal COMMITMENT to only think positive thoughts.
Does this mean you will only have positive thoughts? Heck no! But it does mean that that's your intention and you're going to work at making it happen. And if you do fall off the wagon, you're going to get right back on again!
Step 3 – As you go through your day, instead of criticizing or noticing what's wrong with situations or people look for what's GOOD in them. For example, if you're stuck in traffic and there's nothing to be done about it don't think thoughts of impatience or frustration, focus instead on really being aware of what you're experiencing.
In the words of Dr. Wayne Dyer, “Traffic, in itself, can never irritate anybody. It just does what it does. Traffic doesn't care!” The thing that causes us to 'feel' irritated by traffic is our 'thinking' about it
So instead, focus on living in the moment. Become aware of how the steering wheel feels in your hands. Pay attention to the rhythm of your breathing. Notice how your lungs fill as you inhale and empty as you exhale. Take deeper breaths than normal and notice how that relaxes you. Appreciate the opportunity to slow down and relax.
Another example. If you're faced with a task that you really don't like, focus all of your attention upon it and do it as well as you can. Ask yourself, “How can I do this better than I've ever done it before?” and then focus only on doing that. You'll probably find that you'll really get into it and next thing you know, it's done ... and done very well.
Again, it's not the task; it's only how you 'think' about it that causes you to be unhappy.
Step 4 – In your day planner (you do have a day planner, don't you?), write out that your INTENTION is to be in a positive frame of mind ... to be happy and enjoy what you are doing and experiencing, whatever that may be. By doing this, each time you check your schedule you'll be reminded that your intention is to think positively and choose happy.
Step 5 – AVOID negative conversations and people as much as possible.
Have you noticed how when you're participating in negative thinking or conversation you have a heavy and uncomfortable feeling in the area of your solar plexus, you know, below the V at the bottom of your rib cage? And when you're engaged in positive, optimistic thoughts and conversations the feelings there are light and comfortable? If you haven't noticed begin, paying attention.
So ... don't talk with others about all that 'is' wrong or 'could go' wrong. Instead, change the subject or leave ... seek out positive, optimistic people instead. After all, which feelings would you rather experience?
Remember ... each day that you wake up is another day you will live and experience life. 'How' you experience it though is up to you, it's your choice. Why not choose happy?
To your success,
Reg Neufeld
Growing Into Success Training
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